A Written Warning & An "OH MY"

Ann ordered a beach theme cake, and asked the baker to write "Happy Birthday Lorenzo" on the ocean part.

She got this:

...which has to be the first time a literal LOL actually pales in comparison to the butchered name of the birthday boy.

Seriously, how do you turn "Lorenzo" into "Boricua"?? That's only two correct letters! Out of seven! Why... what... HOW....? [head explodes]

Ahem.

When a house warming party turns ominous:

[whisper] "Geeeeet OOOOUUUUUTTT!"

Deb wants to know if she's the only one who sees a Pumpkin man wearing a fig leaf on this cake:

Dear Deb,

NOPE.

Signed,
Everyone.

This next one is a Sports Ball thing, so allow me to translate for my fellow sports neophytes: Apparently the Royals (a Sports Ball "team") are sometimes known as the "Boys in Blue."

But after today, that's not ALL they'll be known as:

HEYOOOOOOOOO

"VICTORIAN LACE"

Bakers, I do not think it means what you think it means.

And finally,

Ordering a company logo on a cake can be daunting, but luckily for Will R., the Michael Kors logo is literally just the letters MK.

And yet...

Where there's a Will, there's a way to wreck Will's manager's cake.

Thanks to Ann F., Brady T., Deb B., Sarah F., Terri C., & Will R. for giving his manager the perfect excuse to throw up his/her hands in disgust and cry, "I'M SURROUNDED BY LITTLE MK'S!"

*****

'Tis the season for PSLs, and now your furry friend can have one, too!

Starbarks Pumpkin Spice Latte Plush Toy

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

9 Hilariously Bizarre Halloween Cakes To Make You Go, "Huh?"

Happy Halloween, minions! Let’s go out with a bang, shall we? :D

Bakeries get a lot of leeway this time of year, since Halloween is supposed to have ugly gross stuff:

But there's raspberry jam soaked zombie faces, and then there's... uh... this:

Took me a solid minute to figure it out:

A banana shooting laser beams.

(I am SO GOOD AT THIS, you guys.)

Yep, bakers are once again trying to collectively punk the world, churning out ridiculous Halloween designs each more baffling than the last:

Aliens? Amoebas?
This guy?

I actually see this design a lot:

The angry toilet paper has sprouted arms, and is pulling itself to freedom.

While this roll vows revenge on airbrushes everywhere:

"I am not 'pretty,' I AM THE TERRIFYING TP! Here to WIPE you out! Mwuah-ha-haaawhy are you laughing?"

Next we have an ice cream swirl wearing a traffic cone about to be impaled by a trident.
Because if THAT doesn't say "Happy Halloween"... then don't worry 'cuz the board does:

For some reason ghost sperm are always a big seller this time of year:

They look kinda confused, though, right?
Like they can't tell if they're coming or going.

[HEYO.]

Also confused? Me, after looking at this thing:

They managed to get icing absolutely everywhere except on top of the cupcakes.
Now that's scary.

And finally, a possessed stove burner:

Because haunted appliances are SO hot right now.

("It burns. IT BURRRRNS!")

 Have fun tonight, gang! Remember, this is the one night of the year when it’s OK to have candy for dinner, so take FULL advantage.

There's a ghost of a chance Brittany D., Carrie, Ginny V., Karen S., Megan S., Karrie T., Jennifer K., Jennifer R., & Shannon T. will be ordering out tonight. You're welcome, ladies!

******

P.S. Today's TP ghost cakes led me to the best home accessory ever:

THIS, my friends, is a "Talking Toilet Paper Spindle." You record your own message, which it will play back when your guests spin the roll. [rubbing hands together evilly] I can't wait to use this baby at our next Christmas party.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: